Husband buys gifts and $9,000 car for surrogate, angering wife


A 34-year-old woman and her 37-year-old husband, Hunter, were having fertility issues and decided to find a surrogate to have their child.

The couple was doing everything legally, and the surrogate is a respectful woman who also kept her end of the bargain, but then Hunter started acting weird and pressuring his wife and the surrogate.

He bought the surrogate gifts and even bought her a $9,000 car behind his wife’s back.

After all this was revealed, the wife argued with her husband and freaked out – screaming and getting angry at him, making her feel bad afterwards and worrying whether or not she was wrong to react as she did.

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Looking for some help and comfort, she took to Reddit where she posted on the popular subreddit “r/AmItheA–hole” (AITA), where strangers post their stories and other strangers comment on these stories with notes and advice.

The ratings answer the question in the subreddit’s title, boiling down to “yes” or “no” with a few other options that are rarely used — and in this case, the resounding vote was no.

“It’s Hunter starting to act weird,” wrote the woman who posted the message.

“I noticed he was focusing all of his attention on our surrogate, like skipping work to visit her or getting her things she didn’t ask for, chatting with her all the time on social media and constantly offering to do things for her likes… driving her around and sometimes even asking her out or offering to fix things for her.

This all sounds weird for someone to do while they’re married, even someone who has you and your wife’s child, but it gets a whole lot worse from there.

“She complained to me about it and even told me things he was doing that I didn’t even know about, like bringing him presents,” she said, deciding that she would tell him about it.

When she brought it up, however, he got defensive, saying it was “for her son and not for her.”

When she asked him to tone it down, he accused her of being jealous and said it made her look bad.

When she told him the surrogate was the one complaining, he was in denial, so she left him alone for a while.

“Yesterday our surrogate called me to say that Hunter had come over and told his guests to leave, I asked why and she said he wanted to show her the 9k car he had bought for her,” she continued.

“I was shocked, she said she refused the car and asked him to leave, but he started arguing with her about using public transport and the risk to well-being. be of our baby.”

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$9,000 is a lot of money to spend behind your wife’s back on a car for your surrogate.

After demanding that he return home, she fought with him, making a strong point that seems to get to the heart of this issue.

“I told him to stop disrespecting the woman and to stop using the baby as an excuse to trample on her boundaries,” she said.

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After that, he turned it on her, saying she wasn’t doing enough and claiming she didn’t care.

He refused to talk to her for a moment, and that’s when doubt started to creep in and she needed to know if she was wrong.

Fortunately, all the Redditors are on his side and call the behavior of this 37-year-old man disturbing and borderline stalker.

They try to formulate reasons why he might behave this way – that he has a crush on the surrogate, that he tries to control his body, and even that he feels guilty for needing a surrogate mother and that he compensates for the posting.

Some Redditors offer suggestions in the form of legal advice in which the surrogate could formally state her needs in order to get Hunter arrested.

Hopefully the amateur advice she received from these internet strangers gave her the comfort she needed and the ideas to help her through this situation with her husband and surrogate.

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Isaac Serna-Diez is a writer who focuses on entertainment and current affairs, social justice and politics. Follow him on Twitter here.


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